The importance of Self-care for your mental health

What comes to mind when you hear the phrase self-care? If you’ve spent much time on the internet since 2016, self-care probably makes you think of bubble baths, green juice, pilates, skincare routines and so on. 

These are all nice things, and they can absolutely be part of self-care for some people, but the fact is that when you’re really struggling with your mental health you likely won’t feel like putting together an instagram-perfect bubble bath. No matter how aesthetically pleasing your scented candle and glass of green juice, they probably won’t help much with your depression or anxiety either. 

However, that’s not to say self-care isn’t important. As a psychotherapist, I often talk to my clients about their self-care. The truth is that before it was used as a term to sell things to us, ‘self-care’ just meant taking actions to maintain or improve our health and happiness. These are the kinds of actions that we often stop or reduce when our mental or physical health isn’t good.

The occupational therapist and illustrator Hannah Daisy has a fantastic series about ‘boring self-care’. These are the things that don’t seem so exciting, but are often the things we stop doing when we’re feeling low - having a shower, getting out of bed, taking our medications, texting friends, eating vegetables, standing outside for a few minutes. 

For my clients who are really struggling with mental health, we start to set small manageable goals around this kind of self-care and this starts a cycle of caring for themselves, so they feel slightly better, so are able to do slightly more self-care the following day. 

Some clients I work with are able to do that kind of ‘boring self-care’, enough to keep themselves functioning, but there are other types of self-care they find difficult. This might include setting boundaries with work or family members, taking time to themselves instead of caring for others, or slowing down to nurture their own spirituality. This can lead to a feeling of unease or unhappiness that’s hard to pin down. 

Whether you're balancing work, family, relationships, or personal goals, taking time to care for yourself is crucial for living a healthy and fulfilling life.

I’ll often suggest that my clients do a ‘self-care’ assessment and see if there are any areas of self-care they could improve on. I’ll include a link to the self-care assessment worksheet I give to clients at the end of this post.

Sometimes, people are very good at one kind of self-care but are neglecting another area, and improving the balance also improves their mental wellbeing. For example, someone might do a lot of physical self-care - exercising every day and eating lots of nutritious food, but they might do very little social self-care and spend little time with family and friends leaving them feeling disconnected and alone. 

In this post, we’ll explore the five pillars of self-care and discuss why they are essential to improving your well-being.

The Pillars of Self-Care

You’ve probably understood by now that self-care isn’t just about pampering yourself with occasional treats—it encompasses a range of activities that nurture your physical, emotional, social, spiritual, and professional health. When you prioritise self-care across these different areas, you’re better able to handle life’s challenges and maintain a sense of balance.

Physical Self-Care Your physical health is essential to your overall well-being. Physical self-care involves taking care of your body through proper nutrition, regular exercise, and getting enough sleep. Engaging in physical self-care helps you maintain energy, manage stress, and prevent health problems. If this is an area you struggle with, simple activities like going for a walk, getting more sleep, or eating more balanced meals can go a long way in boosting your physical and mental health​.

Psychological and Emotional Self-Care Your emotional health is just as important as your physical health. Emotional self-care involves managing stress, processing your emotions, and nurturing your mental well-being. Activities like journaling, meditating, talking to a friend, going to therapy or engaging in hobbies can help you recharge emotionally. Part of emotional self-care is also setting boundaries, taking breaks from responsibilities, and giving yourself permission to rest when needed. Emotional self-care helps you build resilience and maintain a positive outlook on life​.

Social Self-Care We are social beings, and maintaining healthy relationships is a key component of self-care. Social self-care means making time to connect with others, whether that’s through spending time with friends and family, joining groups where you will meet new people, or having meaningful conversations with your loved ones. It’s about nurturing relationships that bring joy and support into your life, while also recognizing when you need alone time to recharge.

Spiritual Self-Care Spiritual self-care is about connecting with something greater than yourself, whether that’s through religion, nature, or personal reflection. It involves activities that nourish your spirit and give your life meaning. This could include meditation, prayer, spending time in nature, or engaging in activities that align with your values. Spiritual self-care helps you stay grounded and provides a sense of purpose that can guide you through life’s challenges​.

Professional Self-Care Whether you’re working in an office, running a business, or managing a household, professional self-care is essential to maintaining a healthy balance between work and personal life. Professional self-care includes setting boundaries at work, pursuing professional development, and creating a workspace that supports your productivity and well-being. Taking regular breaks, saying “no” to excessive responsibilities, and finding meaning in your work are all ways to ensure that your professional life is fulfilling without overwhelming you​.

Why Self-Care Matters

Self-care is more than just a way to unwind. It’s about actively nurturing your mind, body, and spirit so that you can live your best life. When you consistently practise self-care, you’re better equipped to handle stress, maintain your health, and stay connected with the things that matter most to you.

Neglecting self-care, on the other hand, can lead to burnout, increased stress, and even health problems. When we constantly put others’ needs before our own or push ourselves to the limit, we deplete our energy and resilience. Over time, this can result in feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, and disconnected from what truly brings us joy and fulfilment.

Prioritising Self-Care

Incorporating self-care into your life doesn’t have to be complicated or time-consuming. Start by assessing your current self-care practices. Are you neglecting your needs in the areas of any of the five pillars of self-care? What small changes could you make to improve your self-care in these areas? Start with the smallest change possible to make sure that your goal is a manageable one. 

Self-care is about making choices that support your well-being—whether it’s setting aside time to exercise, taking a break when you need it, or spending quality time with loved ones. The key is to make self-care a regular part of your routine, not just something you turn to when you’re feeling overwhelmed.

If you’re already feeling overwhelmed, see what kind of ‘boring self-care’ you could introduce into your life. And give yourself credit for doing it! 

By prioritising self-care, you’re investing in your long-term health and happiness. Remember, taking care of yourself isn’t selfish—it’s essential for living a balanced, fulfilling life. When you nurture yourself, you’re better able to show up fully in all areas of your life, bringing your best self to your work, relationships, and hobbies.

If you’d like to assess your current self-care, the worksheet I recommend to my psychotherapy clients can be found here

Please do get in touch if you think you could benefit from working on your self-care with a trained mental health professional.